Asking for Help

For almost three decades, my church has been sending a team every two years on a short term missions trip to different parts of Africa. Since my family became part of the church community after our move to Omaha 14 years ago, I had been involved in helping each team raise funds for the work to be done while they’re in Africa. But until about seven years ago, I never considered actually going with the team.

The major reason for this was funding.

Each member of the team had to raise funds to pay for all their expenses while on the trip - typically between $4,000 and $5,000. This is usually done by asking friends and family to contribute. If you know me well enough, you’d realize that asking for money from others is something that I would rather not do, to put it mildly. It makes me very uncomfortable. So, I concluded that if I wasn’t able to write a check to cover the entire amount for the trip, it was not  for me.

As a result, every time I was asked to go with each team, my response was the same: “I can’t go because I don’t want to ask people for money.” This continued until about eight years ago. After I gave that response to the pastor who was leading the team on the trip, he grabbed me by my shoulders, looked into my eyes, and said, “Sunday, you just need to swallow your pride and ask for help!”

Ouch!

That stung on many levels.

Later that week as I recovered from the sting, I reflected and realized that truly, it was my pride at play. I wanted to present and maintain the appearance that I had everything together when I did not. This was one of the lessons on humility that I learned and which I wrote about in my book, Nothing Higher: Why You Need to Descend in Order to Soar. Since then, I’ve learned to continually deal with this whenever it rears its ugly head.

Also, I know how beneficial it is to give to those who are in need. I write regularly in this newsletter about the importance of helping others and giving our time, talents, and resources to worthy causes. Multiple studies have shown that we’re happier and healthier when we are generous with what we have. Blessings flow in different forms towards those who give.

Then I realized something!

When I shy away from asking for, and receiving help for the missions trip, I’m denying others the opportunity to receive the blessings that would have been theirs as a result of their generosity. I definitely don’t want to do that!

So, why am I sharing all these, you ask. Well, it’s because after a 4-year hiatus due to the pandemic, we’re now preparing for another such trip to Zambia. It’s scheduled for June 2024 and I’m swallowing my pride to ask for your help in funding the trip.

The estimated total amount to be raised by each team member is US$4,000. While I know that some of you can write one check to cover the entire amount, I’m asking that you don’t do that at this time. I would love as many of you as possible to be involved in this so that the blessings that come through giving can reach more people.

If each person can give $100, the amount will be covered with 40 people. But not everyone can afford to give that amount. So, please give as little or as much as you’re able. If all you can afford is $1, $5, $10, $20 or $50, it all adds up. It’s the heart with which you’re giving that matters.

If you’re one of those willing to contribute much higher amounts, please start with the $100 and also let me know privately that you’re able to do more. If there’s still a shortfall as we get closer, I will reach out to you to let you know how you can help further.

Here are the steps you can take to give - please do it now so you don’t forget: 

• Go to https://www.bellevuechristian.com/give and click on the “ONLINE GIVING PORTAL” button

• In the “Fund” dropdown list, select “Missions”

• In the resulting “Sub Fund” dropdown, choose “Zambia 2024”

• In the “Note (optional)” box, please enter ‘“For Sunny Faronbi” so they’d know which team member you’re supporting

• Enter the amount you want to give, fill out your details, and click the “Submit” button

If you prefer to send a personal check, please make it payable to “Bellevue Christian Center” but be sure to include “Zambia 2024/Sunny Faronbi” in the annotation. The mailing address is on the web page I shared earlier.

Finally, whether you’re able to donate or not, if you’re a praying person, please consider praying for me and the team as we prepare for this trip.

I thank you for your generosity, kindness, and support.

Doing What You Say You’d Do

Have you ever wanted something so much that it is painful to reject it because an acceptance violates a core principle of your existence?

I experienced something akin to this recently.

A few months ago, I had the opportunity to interview for an executive-level position with a great organization. This is an organization for which I have great respect and have admired from afar for many years. Their mission was in perfect alignment with my values, so I was thrilled when the opportunity presented itself. After going through a few stages of interviews and assessments, I had the opportunity to have a final chat with the hiring manager, a C-Suite executive.

During our first video meeting, he was five minutes late. Because being late for anything is a huge red flag for me, I made a note of this, so I would not forget the details in case I choose to address it later. I also noted that he gave no reason for being late to the meeting. But I thought it was good to give him the benefit of the doubt. After all, he was a very busy executive, so being late to a meeting by five minutes can be excused - at least at that time, being the first time in my experience with him.

A couple of weeks later when he was supposed to call me, his call came 13 minutes after the agreed time. This time, he said he had thought it was another video meeting and was looking for the link. I accepted his reason but also made a note of it. During that discussion (it was a Friday), he told me that he was ready to extend an offer and that I should give his team until the end of the following week to put everything together.

When the following Friday came and went with no further information, I thought I’d give him until the next day since Saturday is technically the last day of the week. If I heard nothing by Monday, I planned to get in touch. On Monday afternoon, I sent him a text to ask what was going on. He responded that he had to deal with an “internal process friction,” and that there would be the need for a final video interview. After that interview, I received an email from his director of office administration a couple of days later asking if I could be available for a quick phone call that morning. During that early morning hour-long discussion, we both concluded that our expectations of what the position entailed were not in alignment. We left the discussion with him saying that we should both give the situation more thought and then regroup later.

By the time we finished talking, it was settled in my mind that the position was not a good fit for me. Even though I was disappointed and really wanted the job, I knew exactly what I needed to do. After thinking over the situation over the next 24 hours, I sent him an email, explaining why I was pulling out of being considered for the position. I then waited for a response. But nothing came.

I thought that not getting a response - any kind of response, even just a simple acknowledgment, was unusual. But I continued to wait, and wait, and wait for more than a month. While waiting, I went through different scenarios in my head about why he didn’t respond. All kinds of conspiracy theories came to mind, but I knew they were all just that - conspiracies - because I didn’t really know the actual reason. Finally, early one morning, I decided it was better to reach out and find out instead of speculating. This was exactly 45 days since I sent that email.

I sent him a text message asking if he could be available for a discussion and he obliged. He immediately sent back a text message that he would call me at 8:20 a.m. that morning. After more than an hour past the time he promised (around 9:30 a.m.), I sent him another text message that I’d been waiting for his call. Still, there was no response. Eventually, his call came at exactly 1:13 p.m. - almost five hours after he promised to call.

I told him I had been expecting a response - any kind of response at all - from my email sent to him a month and a half ago. He simply laughed about it and apologized. He said that he had so many things going on and had simply forgotten to close the loop with me. He also thanked me for making the decision easy for him by my withdrawal from being considered for the position.

I have to say that this executive was very personable and seemed like he would be a great person to work with. But my interactions with him left a very bad taste in my mouth. I couldn’t shake the fact that he had not kept his word to me during each of the opportunities I had to interact with him. He was late each time and didn’t follow through on what he said he’d do. Even though I’m a stickler for time, I definitely understand that there are instances when situations beyond one’s control could be responsible for something like this. Still, I believe that such situations are few and far between with people of integrity.

In the rare situations when these happen, those who desire to keep to their word find ways to get in front of it by managing the expectations of those waiting for them. They work hard at saying what they mean and doing what they say. With the highly interconnected world in which we currently live, it’s easier than ever to make a phone call or send a quick text message letting the person know you’re running late. I have found out that someone who is determined to follow through on promises will use whatever means they can find to communicate their inability to deliver before the agreed deadline is reached.

Even before I withdrew my candidacy from the position, I was already skeptical about working with this executive who seemed to be disrespectful of other people’s time. If I had been given an offer, my next step would have been to schedule another discussion with him before accepting it. The major points in that discussion would have had a lot to do with the issue of him not keeping to the promised time during our prior interactions. This was the reason I kept a detailed record of his tardiness so that I would have my facts straight.

As far as I was concerned, such behavior is simply unacceptable for anyone who desires to be taken seriously in their leadership, much less a C-Suite executive. It doesn’t matter how busy they claim to be. I can only imagine how that discussion with him would have gone if it had happened. And I was ready to walk away from the offer if necessary. In the final analysis, I believe that I dodged a bullet by not taking the job. Experiencing what I described here frequently with someone I work with daily would be a very frustrating experience for me. And I wouldn’t have kept quiet about it.

Saying what you mean and doing what you say at the time you promised might seem like a simple proposition for everyone to follow, but living by it can be a challenge for some. If your integrity is important to you, however, it’s a challenge that you must learn to embrace. When you don’t follow through with what you said you’d do, you’re effectively saying that others do not matter, that your words (implied or expressly stated) do not carry the weight they should, and that you cannot be counted upon when it truly matters. I believe this translates to being disrespectful to them.

I don’t think that’s something anyone would want to be known for.

But that’s just me.

Helping Them Replace You

Earlier in my career, I had a manager for whom I had no trust. He didn't keep his promises, especially when it had to do with the career advancement of those of us who worked with him. He seemed to be focused only on his own career progression.

 One time, I got in trouble with him simply because I wrote a small piece for the company's quarterly newsletter without his permission. A friend who worked in the PR department had asked me to write an article about the new fully-automated, state-of-the-art production line that we were installing in one of the plants at the time.

I obliged and got in trouble for it.

Much later, I discovered that this manager had a secret fear that was driving most of his actions. He was afraid of losing his job any one of us who were on his team at that time. To ensure that this didn't happen, he suppressed and tried to censure anything that could give us visibility to people in upper management.

Despite his efforts, the nature of my job responsibilities gave me unique exposures to the company's top executives. Eventually, I was promoted without his knowledge. As my manager, part of his job was to advocate for me and help my career. He did neither. But that didn't prevent my promotion even though his actions delayed it for almost a year.

Although this happened more than 25 years ago, it's very conceivable that there are still managers like him in organizations today. They stifle the careers of their team members for any number of reasons. Whether it's due to malice or selfishness, this is a very short-sighted behavior.

It is my belief that if, as a leader, you're able to develop a few of your team members to the level where they can take over your job, that's exactly what you should do. In fact, I think this should be the goal of every manager - develop your team members so at least one of them is able to replace you.

Why should you do this, you ask? Well, a few reasons come to mind.

Firstly, having your team trained to do your job allows you to delegate more of your responsibilities. In so doing, your team members may discover more efficient ways of handling specific tasks. This can be great for your team's productivity.

In addition, such delegation can give you the time you need to focus on something else. This could provide other opportunities that open the door to something new. One or more innovative ideas, products, and services can result from these.

Also, doing this frees you to be available to move up to the next level in your career. What better way to accelerate your own promotion than having others be ready to replace you?

Finally, even if all else stays the same, being diligent in developing your team members can create a sense of belonging. It lets them know that you're fully invested in their career development and growth. With this, you secure their trust and support for the long haul - way beyond your current position and theirs.

Who wouldn't want to be on a team like that?

I definitely would.

Better Than Gold

I’m certain that you’ve heard of the golden rule. You have, haven’t you? Yes, I’m sure you have.

Do to others what you would have them do to you.

What may be less known is that the golden rule was supposed to be an upgrade of another rule called the Silver Rule. Some refer to it as the Silver Rule of Confucianism, most likely to specify its source.

Confucius was a Chinese philosopher and politician who lived around 500 BC. His silver rule - “Don’t do to others, what you don’t want done to you” - was meant to prevent people from doing bad things to others. In the March 14, 2022 edition of this newsletter, I wrote that the silver rule is a passive and lazy rule because it doesn’t require action.

About 500 years after Confucius, Jesus Christ appeared on the scene and gave us the golden rule which requires action and proactive behavior. It prompts you to act positively and demands that you’re socially responsible. It encourages you to do for people, the same good and positive things you would like to receive from others.

This is a good thing, right?

Yes, it is, but it still poses an important dilemma.

How do you know if others would want or appreciate the good and positive things you want for yourself? You may be wondering why someone would not want something good, but good to whom? Whose definition of good should we go with?

Yours or theirs?

What is desirable to you may not be something another person wants. It reminds me of an experience I had almost 20 years ago after I was promoted to lead a team of engineers as a project manager. I thought I was doing something good for the lead engineer on one of my projects when I began to share with him what he needed for him to get a similar promotion.

His response surprised me.

He told me he didn’t want a position that would require him to lead teams. He said he was content with where he was. I was trying to get him something that I thought was good, but he didn’t see it the same way.

This is where I think the Platinum Rule enhances the golden rule.

In their book appropriately titled, The Platinum Rule, Michael O'Connor and Tony Alessandra make a strong case for us to “Do unto others as they would like done unto them.” This is about doing for others what they want done for them and not what I think they would want done for them. It’s about helping them to become who they want to be and not about helping them to become who I want them to be.

So, what does this mean for us?

It means we don’t make assumptions that what’s good for us is good for others. It means asking them what good we can do for them and then helping them to accomplish it, if we have the means to do so. In doing so, we become true partners in their progress.

In whose progress will you be a partner this week?

An Unforgettable Gift

On the first day of this month, I met Cecil. He was the Uber driver who took me that day from my Airbnb to the PMI Summit I was attending at Caesars Palace in Las Vegas. The ride took about 8 minutes but I learned a lot about him during that time.

He's retired and in his sixties. But more than 20 years ago, he had spent 18 months in various countries in Africa with his wife and their two children. He also told me how he had lived in other countries in Europe and Asia which enabled each of his two children to speak six different languages.

Then he shared something fascinating with me.

The car in which I was riding was his third Tesla sedan in less than five years. He buys each one for the sole purpose of using them to give Uber rides for about two years. During that period, he would give rides to many students from the University of Nevada, Las Vegas (UNLV). Each time, after dropping them off, he would write their name and phone number on a small piece of paper and put it in a hat he has at home.

When the two-year period of driving the car is up, he would call his wife and adult children together, and they would have a raffle with a drum roll. Then a member of the family would draw a name from the hat he's been dropping the names of UNLV students.

He would gift the car to the lucky recipient.

He gave out the most recent one a few months ago to a student he had given a ride a couple of months before. He and his wife took the car to her workplace at a Wendy's restaurant location. His wife had called to be sure of when the young lady would be at work. Then he showed up to say he would like to talk to her outside about a problem with a drive-thru order.

When they got outside, his wife was waiting by the car with a giant bow on it. She was so overjoyed that she started crying. Then, his wife began to cry.

What I find impressive are the lengths Cecil and his family went to make the presentation of the gift very memorable for that young woman. Such a gift is something she's unlikely to forget for the rest of her life.

You and I may not be able to gift a car to someone every two years, but we can still do our best to make someone's day. All it takes is for us to put it at the forefront of our minds and be intentional about doing something special for someone.

It may surprise them, but that shouldn't stop us. They could be wondering why, but we shouldn’t worry about that. All we need to bother ourselves with is meeting a need that we know is there even when they may not have asked us for help. Or maybe they have.

So, when did you last do something out of the ordinary to make someone's day? If you have to think long to find out, it may be a good time to create a fresh experience.

To whom can you add value this week?

Giving of Yourself

The first time I went on a short-term mission trip to Africa, I was surprised that I had to pay in order to go. In my mind, I was doing a good thing by being willing to go and serve in a remote part of Africa, so why should I have the extra burden of bearing the costs?

I thought I was making some great sacrifices, so shouldn’t that count for something? I had to take 10 days off work, using my “hard-earned” paid time off (PTO). We were also going to work in a very remote part of Tanzania. Who knows what kinds of hardship we would have to face?

Since I was already giving a lot just to go, how does it make sense that I also had to cough up more than US$4,000 to cover my own travel and living expenses during the trip? Someone should be paying for that!

Of course, I didn’t know who that someone was supposed to be. It just wasn’t supposed to be me! I was so naïve it wasn’t even funny!

I didn’t tell anyone what I was thinking at the time (thankfully!) but it simply didn’t make sense to me that I would be making all those “sacrifices” and still had to pay my own way. After all, it wasn’t as if I was getting anything in return.

It was in that last thought that my huge mistake lay.

There may be others like me who see volunteering for something or serving others as all pain and no gain. However, if you have had the opportunity to serve anywhere, you already know the immense benefits that come from lending a helping hand, especially when it’s very much needed.

Numerous studies have shown how rewarding it can be when you serve others with your time and skills: from improving self-esteem, physical health, and longevity to increasing happiness, providing a sense of purpose, and reducing dementia risks. These, and many more, are the reasons most people have developed a heart for giving and serving.

And then, there are some who simply want to do some good in the world.

I believe that last statement is true for every member of the team from my church who chose to travel to Florida last month to help with cleanups after Hurricane Ian's devastation. I’m dedicating this edition of the newsletter to these selfless individuals.

The youngest on the team was in his mid-twenties while the oldest was a great-grandfather in his sixties. Each person paid to cover their own travel and living expenses and everyone took time off work in addition to enduring a 58-hour road trip during those eight days to serve our friends in Cape Coral, Florida.

Here are a couple of specific sacrifices a few people on the team made:

• Dan, a businessman gave up close to US$2,000 in potential income during that period.

• Amy, an experienced nurse gave up the huge income she would have received from her three clients.

• After the rest of the team left, Scott stayed behind for an extra week when he saw the magnitude of the help needed.

If you ask any of these people if it was worth it, you won’t get a hint of hesitation from them. Yes, they gave up so much in order to serve those who desperately needed it, but they would be the first to tell you that they would do it again in a heartbeat because the benefits to them were more than worth the sacrifices.

And those same benefits can be yours when you choose to give of your time, skills, and abilities to help and serve others.

There are great opportunities for each one of us when serving becomes a lifestyle and not just something we do only when there's a need created by disastrous and catastrophic events. You will begin to notice a positive change in your life when you wake up each morning asking yourself,

“To whom can I be of service today?”

Humankindness

Luke and Jessie owned a beautiful home in Fort Myers, Florida. When Hurricane Ian hit more than a month ago, their entire neighborhood was flooded. For several days, more than two feet of standing water was in their home. Very few of the houses in southwestern Florida were spared in the devastation.

After the water receded, it left behind much destruction in its wake -damaged home appliances, soaked walls, and furniture busted beyond repair. The couple’s lives have been turned upside down but they had no time to mourn. A cleanup of the mess left behind must be done quickly to ensure that whatever can be redeemed in the structure of the house is preserved.

That's when Seth (not his real name) offered his services. He is the boyfriend of Jessie's niece, so he's well-known to the family. He offered to help Luke and Jessie move their damaged furniture and appliances from inside the house to the curb in front of their home.

For a fee of US$5,000.

Yes, you read that right! And I'm not making this up. I heard this from the horse's mouth. Well, from Luke's mouth.

He simply couldn't believe it. Someone he considered a close friend tried to take advantage of their predicament in order to make a quick buck.

In addition, Luke told me that Seth had offered to bring three of his friends and the four of them would work together would tear out and remove all the damaged walls in the house. This applies to the portion of every wall in the house up to four feet high from the floor. He proposed to do the work at the rate of US$100 per hour per person. For the four of them, that comes to US$400 per hour.

I did some math to estimate how much this would have cost.

I was there when everything damaged in the house was torn down and hauled out and it was a lot of work. My estimate is that it took 19 people about 7 hours over a period of two days to get the work done. That's a total of about 133 man-hours. At the rate Seth was asking for, this would have cost US$13,300.

Jessie also told me that an insurance adjuster had earlier approached them and told them that it would cost about US$80,000 to fix everything that had been damaged. The guy also wanted an immediate down payment of US$20,000 before any work would start.

As I listened to what this couple and their three little kids had endured within the span of three weeks, beginning with the devastation by the hurricane, it occurred to me that there are many others like them. And in situations like this, you would always find vultures who are circling overhead to pick apart the vulnerable.

I couldn't help but marvel at how the mind of a depraved human being works. It never ceases to amaze me.

Still, what I find comforting is that in the same space where you come across selfish and self-serving folks such as Seth, you also find people who are completely selfless and willing to do all that they can. There are those eager to serve and lend a helping hand to people in need without demanding any compensation.

Over a nine-day period, I spent time with a team of people who spent their own money, and time, in addition to sacrificing more than a week of their lives to help complete strangers like Luke and Jessie, among others. I'll be writing about the sacrifices some of these made people soon.

For now, it would be good for you and me to do some serious soul-searching. I think it’s easy for us to condemn Seth as a fortune-seeking scoundrel who is trying to take advantage of people in desperate situations.

But I wonder - do we engage in similar practices?

Do I try to exploit others who are in dire straits and who need urgent help? Do you?

Do you raise your prices when there's a high demand for your products and services, especially when those in need of those products and services had been hit with unforeseen calamities they couldn't have prepared for? Some of us choose to hide behind the law of supply and demand, but we know what this truly is - exploitation.

But I think we can be better. I believe there's a reason why we cannot spell humankind without the "kind" at the end of it. It’s time we put kind back into humankind.

It's time for more humankindness.

Unconditional Compassion

Two separate events last week got me thinking about something. They happened three days apart on different continents. One was a discussion with one of my cousins. The other happened at a party over the weekend.

 What I realized from these events wasn't really a surprise. It's something I've been aware of for a while. Those events simply made me see it with a fresh perspective.

 I'm sure by now you're wondering what it was.

 It's the realization that my compassion seems to be reserved for those who have not been mean, nasty, and malicious towards me.

 It doesn't matter how close the person is to me, if they've shown a pattern of being nasty and disrespectful to me, my compassion for them tends to register at very low levels - that is if it exists at all. And this happens without my conscious awareness.

Does this make me a heartless person?

I hope not!

The interesting thing is that I think of myself as a compassionate person, at least per dictionary definition. The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines compassion as a consciousness of others' distress together with a desire to alleviate it.

I know that when I come across someone suffering or needing help, I always have this desire to do something about it. Sometimes, I would move mountains to make it happen no matter what it costs me.

Still, I've discovered that my desire to alleviate such suffering is usually proportional to how they've treated me in the past.

If I had no history with the person, my compassion for them is usually at very high levels. It's even higher for people that I know and who I like. However, if my history with them had been one of being denigrated and disrespected, I found that my unconscious compassion for them is usually low or non-existent.

When something that requires a compassionate response happens to such a person, my initial unconscious reaction tends to be along the lines of, "You brought this on yourself. Now you get to suffer the consequences!"

Of course, I'm usually not thinking that, but that's what my initial inaction seems to communicate. This is especially true if I have previously warned them against taking the steps that landed them in the predicament necessitating the need for a compassionate response.

That's when you want to say, "Good for you! I told you so!"

But in my heart, I know that's not a good response. Neither is it an empathetic one, so I never say those words. But I'm thinking it! And it shows in my behavior towards them because I take minimal steps (or do nothing) to help them.

As I thought of this yesterday, it occurred to me that how others have treated us in the past should not be a barometer for how we show them compassion in the present. I think our desire to be compassionate should come from our shared common humanity. It shouldn't hinge on how more or less we liked them.

As I thought of ways to combat this tendency, a series of steps that I usually teach during my emotional intelligence seminars came to mind. I call it Conscious Directional Thinking (CDT). When adapted for this specific scenario, it consists of the following few simple steps: 

1. Take time to think about how the person has treated you and acknowledge to yourself how their behavior has hurt you. There's no need to sugarcoat it.

2. Next, make an excuse for them to explain their actions. For example, they probably didn't realize the extent of the damage they've caused. This is more difficult than it seems but it can be done.

3. Then, make a conscious decision to show them compassion even if you think they don't deserve it. It's a decision you're choosing to make based on who you are and not on what they've done.

4. Decide on the actual steps you would take to show them compassion.

5. Take action on those steps.

When you practice these steps consistently, I have no doubt you'll begin to see your compassion level go up, especially toward those who have spurned you in the past.

As I wrap up this newsletter, I'd love for you to respond to this question. Do you also find yourself unconsciously responding the way I described towards people who have been nasty and disrespectful to you?

Or am I the only weird one?

Silver or Gold

Have you heard of the Silver Rule?

You probably know about the Golden Rule. It's more popular than its "Silver" cousin.

The Golden Rule says to do to others what you would have them do to you.

The Silver Rule on the other hands says "what you do not want done to you, do not do to others."

Some equate these two. They think the silver rule and the golden rule are essentially the same.

I beg to differ.

The Silver Rule is a negative opposite of the Golden Rule. It's the idea that if you know something would cause someone pain, you shouldn't do that thing to them. That sounds reasonable, isn't it?

Well, if you take a close look, the Silver Rule doesn't require you to do anything. It’s lazy. It's passive. Yes, it asks you to withhold negative action. But it requires no positive action.

The fact is that most people would not intentionally cause someone pain. Apart from the psychopath or the criminally-minded, it's rare to find someone who would seek to deliberately do terrible things to other people.

We would readily, even if unconsciously, acquiesce to the dictates of the silver rule. What doesn't come natural for us is to actively seek to do good for others. In contrast, that's what the golden rule prescribes.

The golden rule requires proactive behavior. It prompts you to act positively. It demands that you're socially responsible, which is not natural for many of us.

Our natural inclination is to be selfish and self-serving. It's ingrained in us to choose our own best interests rather than seeking those of others. It's all about us and our needs; everyone else be damned. The current war in Ukraine is an example of what happens when this idea is taken to its illogical and irrational extents.

It just doesn't make sense.

Yet, we're called to something higher; something better. To live a thriving life is to seek a thriving life for others. To live a flourishing life is to have a self-giving existence.

Being socially responsible doesn't mean you have to do something significant. It just needs to be meaningful. It doesn't need to cost you a ton. It only requires you to be self-giving; to be intentional.

So, in what self-giving act will you engage this week?

To whom will you intentionally add value today?